The three attributes exercised by parents and guardians were pinpointed by Fegans which has a surveyed hundreds of children and parents.
Describing healthy examples of encouragement, chief executive officer Ian Soars told Premier's News Hour: "That means moving beyond 'you like pretty' or 'you did really well in that test result'.
"[It means] actually talking about their attributes as a child like 'I love the way you showed courage in that situation' or 'I love that you showed compassion or you were kind."
Have you seen our Strength to Share report yet? https://t.co/gAjTgi8JFJ #WorldMentalHealthDay https://t.co/HSYhkgWY7n
— Fegans (@Feganscharity) October 10, 2017
Fegans, which offers children's counselling and parent support services in London and the South East, questioned more than 600 youngsters and nearly 200 parents at the New Wine United 2017 event in Shepton Mallet, Somerset over the summer.
The findings were published in its new Strength to Share report, which concluded that parenting tactics such as controls on kids behaviour and reassurance of constant love provides both "resilience" and "security".
Family and friends are of more importance to children than technology, hobbies, sports, friends, food and even their faith - the survey concluded.
It also pinpointed online safety as a concern for 72 per cent of mothers and fathers.
Click here to hear Premier's Tola Mbakwe speaking with Ian Soars: